Horton speaks!

Folk hero Horton (The Headshaker), of Tim and Horton fame, tells how he took down the Martin gang -- only in your soaraway Star:

Selfishly, perhaps blindly, I only thought about the money ($500) and the free meatball sandwiches I got for showing up at the diner that day. It didn't occur to me that when my face was saying, "Paul Martin, are you kidding me?" it would make the nation say, "Paul Martin, are you kidding us?" Polls from SES Research and Strategic Counsel have shown that the Liberals' numbers started to tank when my commercial hit the air. Which is why there ended up being three cuts of that commercial and my face ended up in print ads. A monster had been born and he had my beautiful face. What I'm trying to say is, Paul Martin, I'm sorry. I never thought my face would take down a government. The fact is, you were entitled to a fair fight and you didn't get one. Harper had a secret weapon, a weapon that stares at me in the mirror every morning.

Turns out he's an actor and comedian by the name of -- get this -- Pat Thornton. Can you believe it? Thornton -- two letters off! ALSO: See this useful account of the impact of the debates. Hint: think Kennedy-Nixon.