don't let your babies grow up to do PhDs

Since I gave up trying to find full-time academic work last year, I have had a handful of exchanges with professors around the country regarding the state of the university job market and my (lack of) place in it. Most of the advice has taken the form of well-intentioned encouragement (of the "don't give up, you'll find work if you keep plugging away" variety), which has been touching, but ultimately mis-directed. The simple fact is, trying to be an academic didn't make me happy, it made me miserable. And, slowly, it dawned on me that there are more remunerative ways of being miserable. Or at least, less miserable ways of being ill-paid. Thus, it is somewhat gratifying, in a good-fucking-god sense of "gratifying", to see this:

THE WAGES OF ACADEMIA A recent job posting at the City University of New York offered a position in teaching literature, rhetoric and composition. The instructor (not professor) had to publish and carry a full load of teaching, which includes grading papers and consulting with students after class. Candidates had to have a “doctorate from an accredited university” and “demonstrated excellence in teaching.”?The salary started at $35,031.

Another job posting offered a position that required a bit less education:?plumber. The qualified candidate had to know how to repair pipes and have five years of experience.

The salary began at $77,483.

There’s an old joke about the lawyer who had to call a plumber to fix a sink. When he saw the bill, he said, “That’s more than I charge.”?

“I know,”?the plumber says. “That’s what I said when I was a lawyer.”?

Unfortunately, in New York City in 2006, the joke isn’t so funny anymore

Even less funny, is that by Canadian standards of pay for instructors, US$35k for a full teaching load is good money. (link via the Aldaily)